In my last column I wrote about my thoughts relative to gratitude as I reflected upon Thanksgiving Day approaching. By the time you read this, most of us will have had our fill of turkey, ALL the side dishes and desserts that make up a feast, hopefully around tables with family and friends who you appreciate and love. For us, my husband and I enjoyed the day with my brother and his family in his home. It’d been several years since we enjoyed a Thanksgiving Day together, so with great intention, we made the decision to spend time together.

With thoughts of gratitude behind me now, my mind has transitioned to “giving”. Christmas is fast approaching which is the most popular season of giving in today’s culture. The spirit of Christmas seems to lure folks into jolly attitudes and loving generous hearts that fill kettles for Salvation Army, purchase gifts for needy families, line community pantry shelves with food…send extra financial gifts to organizations in our community and even around the world.

This past week I taught a lesson for our local Celebrate Recovery group. Lesson 23 is titled “Give” and is based on Step 12 of the program: “Having had a spiritual experience as the result of these steps, we try to carry this message to others and practice these principles in all our affairs”. A scripture that accompanies this step comes from Matthew 10:8: “Freely you have received, freely give”.  

In order to add some personal depth to my lesson, I asked for answers to this question I posted on one of my social  media accounts. “What is your main way of giving: financial, volunteering, performing tasks without pay, etc.” The responses I received were great so I’m sharing some of them in my column this week.

• Jackie & her husband Rick provide afghans and blankets for Veterans. Together, they purchase all the supplies. Jackie does the crocheting. At Christmas, Rick bakes dozens of cookies to give to the staff at the Veterans’ Hospital in Saginaw.
• Jenifer, a single mom, noted that she tithes 10% of her income, serves in children’s ministry and when her budget allows she provides a meal for a family in need. She also focuses on “loving like Jesus” wherever she goes each day.
• Marilyn said “giving is only giving when it hurts a little”. For her, being stretched to give more whether it’s money or her time asks her to answer this question –”what do I need to ‘give’ to make it a true gift.
• Ellen didn’t mince words. “If you need help, I’m your girl!”
• Sarah told me “any craft related creation. You have a vision? If I have the ability, I’m your girl!”
• Julie and her grandkids make care packages for homeless people in their community. Whatever they can fit into a gallon size bag, the items go! Gloves, hat, socks, and personal hygiene products.
• Cassie loves spending time with teens, sacrificing her own schedule to hang out with students.
• Leslie is another one who crochets and knits blankets, mainly for family members. She told me that with every stitch she makes, a prayer is spoken for the person who receives the blanket.
• Gretchen had the most endearing way of giving. She lives in a senior housing apartment complex and recently a woman who is deaf moved into their midst. Gretchen invited an ASL student to come and teach her and the residents American Sign Language. This woman was thrilled and as they all learned how to sign, she was able to help them hone their skills along the way. 

No doubt, with increased inflation all around us at the grocery store, gas stations, restaurants–financial giving will be a stretch for many of us. A harsher economy doesn’t mean that hardships will miraculously go away; on the contrary folks we never expected to fall upon hard times will experience a variety of needs. Yet, many of us, can still help in many ways. One of my best friends Chris lives by the motto to “hold onto things with loose hands”…basically, she has much she can share with someone who needs it more than she. When I heard about this approach to having more than enough, I adopted the concept which has seen an increase in our own generosity.  I also was reminded about a time during the Great Depression when my Grandma Jewell gently chastised my Gramp. 

With a growing number of children to feed, there were most likely 8 mouths around her dinner table by the time the ‘30s rolled into their meager livelihood on the family farm. Putting together a meal took a lot of creativity and prayer. A neighbor down the road had truly fallen on hard times. His wife had died, leaving him with two small children to raise. My dad told me “those kids were pretty smart. They always knew when dinner time was at our house and would lollygag in our yard rather than go home.” Several times Gramp found them at the dinner table making it 10 hungry bellies to fill now. Dad and his siblings found out that in private their father had told Grandma…”Sadie, I can’t keep feeding those kids. I’ve got enough of my own to worry about”. Her gentle response was all he heeded.

“Clarence, those children don’t have a momma and they’re hungry”. 

Her pantry continued to provide for each meal and Grandpa never challenged her again.

Give. How do you respond to this command? I am convinced that my grandmother and countless generous folks in our communities are living out the truth behind Jesus’ words to “freely give” because He has so “freely given”. I’m also confident that many of us have “more” we can sacrifice, ample resources to let go from loosely held hands.

Giving and serving is a thermometer of our love. You can give without loving, but you cannot love without giving. “My children, love must not be a matter of words or talk; it must be genuine, and show itself in action”. 1st John 3:18

“Gratitude turns what we have into enough, and more. It turns denial into acceptance, chaos into order, confusion into clarity…it makes sense of our past, brings peace for today, and creates a vision for tomorrow.”–Melody Beattie

The month of November holds many special days for me, my own birthday and wedding anniversary which are two weeks apart, our son’s birthday, as well as a son-in-law’s. Along with these “personal” celebrations we add in Veteran’s Day and Thanksgiving Day. Scattered throughout the month are countless special days for others. No matter the significance of each event in November, they are all blanketed under an umbrella of “gratitude”. At least, that’s how November is being marketed to us now…midst football games, turkey dinners, Christmas decorations and advertising crowding out everything else before the turkey has even been put in the oven or deep fryer!

I was thinking about Veteran’s Day which we observed last week and the anticipation of Thanksgiving as we check off each day from our calendar leading up to Nov. 23. My mind drifted back to remembering the devastation that occurred in our country on Sept. 11. We all witnessed a flurry of patriotism. Churches saw an increase in attendance, although now those numbers have dwindled again. Most every coat lapel we saw on a TV personality bore a small American flag pin. Flag emblems now adorn most of the uniforms worn by major sporting teams. Many of us began taking a moment to acknowledge a Veteran or a first responder in our midst by giving a “thank you for your service”...I’ve done so myself and though I fear my words are trite, they remain my best. A sincere “thank you” is ample and satisfies my desire to express appreciation. Veteran’s Day also allows me to remember two favorite family stories….

My dad’s father–my Grandpa Jewell—had an elementary education. He was a hard worker who toiled sunup to sundown an 80 acre farm. To supplement income he used his skills with an ax to help clear trees on land in Northern Michigan. Gramp and Gramma raised 11 children during the depression and when World War II drew America into the efforts, my dad and four of his brothers all served in various branches of our military. Fast forward to the end of the war, dad and his brothers came home, married and began civilian life in their respective careers. Grandpa got a letter from the government stating he owed back taxes on the farm. Using his elementary age writing skills and sharp retorts, he wrote back….”you’re telling me I owe $?. Well, you took five of my boys to fight in your war. You didn’t ask me if you could have ‘em’…I think I paid enough.” Family lore told us this story and to this day I believe it and I also know (according to family) Grandpa never heard from the government office again.

One of those five boys, my Uncle Lyle, served in the Air Force as a career which spanned World War II, Viet Nam and final duty assignments in Hawaii before retiring to California. On one of their trips back to Michigan, he and my aunt stopped at a small motel for the night. Before going to bed, Lyle went outside for a walk and noticed a beautiful Harley Davison parked for the evening. As he walked a slow circle  around the bike, admiring it,  he was interrupted and when lifting  his head to find where a big voice was coming from, he was quite startled by the size of the person who clearly was the owner of the bike.

In a rather burly angry tone my uncle was greeted with “what do you think you’re doin!”

“I’m admiring your bike”.

By now the guy had seen the cap Lyle was wearing, one of many he owned. This one bore the P-51B Mustang insignia. “I suppose you’re gonna tell me you fought in World War II”.

“Yes”, I did.

“I suppose you’re gonna tell me you rode in one of those planes”.

“Yes, I did. But, I didn’t only ride in the plane, I was the pilot”.

Following a very brief moment of silence…Lyle thought to himself “what have I gotten myself into here. This guy is huge and he’s probably gonna do something that causes pain”.

Their silence was broken with the bike’s owner extending his hand to shake Lyle’s, creating a bridge between a Harley owner and a retired pilot. In their travels, both had seen a lot of beauty and their fair share of tragedies, too, that my imagination can only try to comprehend and yet not embrace in totality.  “I just wanna thank ya man. Because of you and your service, I have the freedom to ride my bike wherever I want.”

My dad, my uncles, are all gone from our family now. As I read through the quote I used at the top of this article, focusing on the phrase how gratitude can make sense of our past…bring peace…create vision for tomorrow…I’m left with a large measure of assurance how memories and “stories” from my family have helped mold me into the person that I am today. 

Last weekend I had the privilege of thanking a very mature Veteran for his service. He, too, was wearing a cap that proudly bore the insignia for his military branch. Those caps remind these ole guys–and women–of a past filled with heartache and triumph. They are worn very proudly and when I see someone wearing one, I seldom hesitate to take a moment to say “thank you”.

As we approach Thanksgiving Day there will be a lot of preparation for a big meal. Maybe there will be travel arrangements, plans to relax in front TVs to watch the “big game” or indulge in silly movies. How we celebrate this day is by personal choice. My only hope is that more of us will truly pause…allow silence to fall on our tables like a soft rain…and from hearts of humility and gratitude utter a sincere “thank you”….not to nature, not to the universe, not to luck….but to the One Who gives only good gifts from above. If you’ve never prayed before, here’s a little help from our country’s history, a prayer credited to the Pilgrims in the early 1600’s.

“O Lord our God and heavenly Father, which of Thy unspeakable mercy towards us, hast provided meate and drinke for the nourishment of our weake bodies. Grant us peace to use them reverently, as from Thy hands, with thankful hearts: let Thy blessing rest upon these Thy good creatures, to our comfort and sustentation: and grant we humbly beseech Thee, good Lord, that as we doe hunger and thirst for this food of our bodies, so our soules may earnestly long after the food of eternal life, through Jesus Christ, our Lord and Saviour, Amen” 

Apparently my night driving has created two new flaws, as evidenced driving home Tuesday evening from one community to another. It seems I hesitate too long when a stop light turns green and unknown to me I “hug” the center yellow line, maybe a slight swerve or two. That’s what the officer told me.

Yes, I was stopped about 9:15 pm on my drive home, minding my own business, listening to the radio, wondering why the vehicle behind me seemed to be a bit close–tailgating actually…the swirling lights answered that question.

I pulled over. I put the window down. I kept my hands on the wheel. I greeted the officer who didn’t look old enough to shave. I tried to answer his question ‘do you know why I stopped you?’ Why is that the standard first sentence out of their mouths?…I guess I’ll have to ask…followed by the next routine question…’where are you coming from?’ I’m pretty sure they want to see if alcohol can be smelled while having these quizzes…

Tuesday, I had been at a Celebrate Recovery meeting giving my testimony. When I told that to my way-too-young officer he said, “Oh, for alcohol or drugs? (there goes the ole assumption again–everyone in recovery must be an addict!) ‘No, for food issues and codependency’. My answer landed flat, like a deflated balloon falling from the ceiling to the floor.

I provided the usual documents. I confirmed the absence of weapons in my vehicle. I waited for him to run the system for my record.

I listened as he explained that by hesitating too long at the green light I was endangering other drivers. This was his response after I explained to him that as a defensive driver, I always wait a tad bit when my light turns green because I’ve almost been smooked by an oncoming driver. He acknowledged my caution, but made it clear I’m the more dangerous person.

I had no defense for occasionally hugging the center yellow line. I’m sure he was looking to snag an “driving under the influence” person. I got a mild scolding for that offense as well.

What I didn’t get was a “happy belated birthday”. Ya, two days after turning 70 I had an experience with a community police officer that maybe made some assumptions? 

His parting conversation with me included ‘So, no alcohol, no drugs, no shots tonight?’

No, sir. Just water. And a bit more educated about green lights and my version of defensive driving.

Oooh…70 years ago….that seems like a very large number to me all of a sudden. Because on Nov. 5 I turn 70. When did this happen? Well, it happened on a Thursday, 70 years ago…I don’t remember what time of the day I was born. I do know that as my mother’s third baby her labor pains came hard and fast and upon arriving at the hospital I was born a mere 11 minutes later. She never totally forgave my dad for his hesitancy in getting her to the hospital…according to him “it didn’t seem like it was time”.

Sitting here at my laptop, finding myself curious about any significant events that occurred on my birthday, I did a search online. I came up empty handed; nothing of great excitement took place.

Next, I searched to find if November holds any special days during its calendar life. Low and behold I found four that made the list for the 5th. Not in any particular order, here they are:

• World Tsunami Day–there’s one I won’t be concerned with unless I visit a coastal or island country. Living in Mid Michigan my biggest worries are mosquitoes in the summer and lake effect snow from the western side of the state. Since I really like snow, I will check that off my hazard list of things to watch out for as life threatening.
• Love Your Red Hair Day–I DO love red hair! While some shades of this unusual hair color aren’t my favorite, when someone with red hair that is also thick, full of bouncy waves or curls, my attention is grabbed! I’m amazed noticing how some children with red hair have parents who are not…typically being ones with brown or blonde hair. I have a few cousins who have red hair…not sure whose genes they got in that department.
• National Donut Day–who doesn’t like a good donut? For years my favorite flavor was a plain one covered with chopped nuts. Now, I really enjoy a warm cider donut–pumpkin or cinnamon flavor–and if a “filled” pastry is classified as a donut (which is probably not) give me a custard filled one or a long john with bismarck creme…I’ll not turn these tasty treats down, calories ignored…
• Daylight Savings Ends: My husband will tell you EVERY year this is my favorite day. I abhor losing sleep unless for a very good reason…when spring rolls around to set clocks ahead I do my fair share of moaning and groaning. I am a self confessed whiner of all things related to this day and if I WAS in charge, I’d make a law against this nasty day. Just sayin’.

So, that’s what I found…four very different observances. They aren’t anything to make world or national headlines.

I do remember some major events, though, that crossed my 70 years since 1953. Again, in no particular order….the assasination of President John Kennedy (I was a 5th grader) *John Glenn orbiting the moon (I was a sixth grader) *the shootings at Kent State University in May 1970 (I was a junior in high school)  *President Richard Nixon Resignation *Iphones and the Internet take over technology *Death of Princess Diana *Deaths of Dr. Martin Luther King & Bobby Kennedy *September 11 Attack on the World Trade Center  *Covid Virus invades the World in 2020 *deaths of grandparents, parents, uncles, aunts, cousins,  and two brothers.

Looking at my very short list, it’s apparent that negative events hold a stronger place in my memory bank…positive ones are more personal– *that first full time job *buying a brand new Firebird in 1974  *getting married *birth of two children  *seeing our two children marry their spouses *births of four grandchildren *becoming a Christ follower in 1979 *moving from the city to a rural community *working on passion for writing, thus a weekly blog and a weekly column in our local newspaper *embracing physical exercise as beneficial versus drudgery (smile) *almost being able to touch my toes again all these 70 years later …traveling to Israel in 2019 *Seeing the Grand Canyon in 2021 *pursuing educational classes for heightened ministry work…say “hello” to future textbooks and assignments. Am I crazy? We shall see…..

Happy 70th birthday to me. For some odd reason I am looking at a 19 year old gal who had just secured her first full time job, working with men and women who were in their mid 20s, some married, and thinking “Boy, are they OLD….” a young woman who watched her own parents and other family members age with each passing year but never thinking about the day they’d be gone forever…because “don’t we think we’ll have our loved ones forever?”

70 years. I don’t know what’s ahead for me in the next five, 10, 15…into my 90s perhaps? It’s a part of the future I don’t want to think about too long and when I do, there are two conditions 1) I know who everyone is and 2) I can still touch my toes.

Just sayin’. 

All Saints’ Day, also known as All Hallows’ Day, is a Christian holiday that is observed on November 1st in Western Christianity. All Saints’ Day is a Christian memorial day celebrating the honor of all church saints, whether known or unknown. It is a day set aside to honor all the saints who have lived righteous and holy lives in accordance with Christian teachings. All Saints’ Day is part of a broader tradition that includes All Hallows’ Eve (Halloween) on October 31st and All Souls’ Day on November 2nd.

Who are the Saints? Sainthood isn’t limited to those recognized by a group of religious leaders. It’s granted by God Himself to any common, salt-of-the-earth person who simply trusts Christ (1 Corinthians 1:2). Words matter. And sowing confusion about good, biblical words like “saint” is not from God.

“To the church of God that is in Corinth, to those sanctified in Christ Jesus, called to be saints together with all those who in every place call upon the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, both their Lord and ours” (1 Cor. 1:2)

The gospel message is that God the Son came to earth, lived a perfectly obedient life, died on the cross to pay for our sins (Romans 5:1), and rose again, proving His atoning work was complete (Romans 4:22-25). Scripture says that the person of faith actually becomes the very righteousness of God (2 Cor. 5:21)

How do we celebrate All Saints Day?  The Bible doesn’t tell us to pray to the saints (Matt. 6:6) or through the saints (1 Tim. 2:5). Instead, we think of our connectedness to past saints and find inspiration in their stories of God’s faithfulness. Hebrews 11 gives many examples of the great cloud of witnesses whose lives tell of God’s unfailing love and grace. These saints speak from the past and are whispering at this moment…

God is faithful.”
“The Lord is good. Trust Him.”
“His grace was sufficient for me in my trials and is sufficient for you today.”

There’s a hymn that’s traditionally sung around this holiday called “For All the Saints.” It encourages believers to look back through the years of Christian history and think of the millions now enjoying rest and salvation in the presence of God. It’s also meant to encourage believers here and now to press on, looking forward to the glorious day…(source: christianity.com) Alex Crain, Pastor

“How did Halloween come about? Hallow, in Old English, means “holy” or “sacred.” Therefore, “Hallows’ Eve,” or “Halloween,” simply means “the evening of holy persons” and refers to the evening before All Saints Day, which is this day, November 1, on both Anglican and Catholic calendars. Halloween is a mixture of Celtic religious ideas and Christian martyrology.  By the ninth century, Christianity had spread into Celtic lands, where it gradually blended with and supplanted older pagan rites. In 1000 A.D. the church designated November 2 as All Souls’ Day, a time for honoring the dead. Celebrations in England resembled Celtic commemorations of Samhain, complete with bonfires and masquerades. 

Poor people would visit the houses of wealthier families and receive pastries called soul cakes in exchange for a promise to pray for the souls of the homeowners’ dead relatives. Known as “souling,” the practice was later taken up by children, who would go from door to door asking for gifts such as food, money and ale.

In Scotland and Ireland, young people took part in a tradition called guising, dressing up in costume and accepting offerings from various households. Rather than pledging to pray for the dead, they would sing a song, recite a poem, tell a joke or perform another sort of “trick” before collecting their treat, which typically consisted of fruit, nuts or coins.

(source: history.com) 

***

This week children around the globe will enjoy “Trick or Treating”, an activity that was part of my childhood until the age of 12. My neighborhood had about 60 kids in one city block who filled dark sidewalks illuminated only by streetlights, porch lights, and jack-o-lanterns. There were no yard decorations like we see today. Those of us who carved a jack-o-lantern placed them on our porch and at least one or two houses took time to play spooky music wafting through the open door when handing out candy. Halloween has taken on many looks since my childhood in the 50s and 60s, but more importantly, I wanted to draw attention to a day on the church calendar that may be losing its place of significance. I’m speaking of “All Saints Day” which is observed on November 1. Rather than attempt to write a book report style article on this sacred day, I looked at two sources to describe this tradition and how it relates to October 31 and all its trappings we now simply call “Halloween”. 

The church I grew up in observed All Saints Day without fail. At the close of service, our pastor read each deceased person’s name which was followed by the ringing of one bell in the tower. Depending on how many folks we lost from January to November, the list could be short or lengthy. Listening to each name, hearing each bell, which broke somber silence was special and acknowledged losses for loved ones gathered in the pews. My home church, St. John’s Lutheran, was a congregation established by German speaking immigrants in the mid 1800s. For over 150 years the church thrived in Downtown Saginaw. Several years ago, the church closed its doors for Sunday worship. Membership dwindled to well below 100 people. The building still stands. Other agencies now use parts of the building for community services. Although diminished activity inside her brick walls still takes place on weekdays, the bells have been silent. 

There’s no call for their ringing, no names to prelude their beautiful chime. Hundreds of dearly departed souls over the span of the church’s life have each had designated recognition with each passing year. My mother’s bell rang in 1999 and dad’s came in 2012. When I recall hearing their name and the bell’s chime, I smile. They are now part of the “great cloud of witnesses” as described by the Apostle Paul in Hebrews 12: 1-2.

MY HEART IS WITH ISRAEL

Heaviness. Heartache. Worry. Fear. Questions. Unbelief.

Those–and adjectives I cannot come up with to describe my emotions–are, and have been swirling in my mind since Israel was attacked by an evil group of Hamas terrorists. Innocent men, women, children, babies–gone–by a swipe of a blade or gunshot….it doesn’t matter the method. The outpouring of innocent blood floods homes, streets, businesses, and the very land these people covered with everyday footsteps going about their work and play until the fateful first blows from the terrorists.

When images and news of the brutal attacks began making their appearance on social media and other outlets, my own heart jumped and immediately I knew our world was turning upside down as we all witnessed the evil causing bloodshed, death, and displacement of numerous families. And although being thousands of miles away from the beautiful country of Israel distances me from the chaos, my heart and mind are connected in a supernatural way created by God Himself along with biblical history of the Jewish people…and my own memories of our trip to Israel in 2020.

Though a variety of opinions exist regarding Israeli and Palestinian people, it doesn’t change the depth of anguish I feel for the events unfolding before my eyes every day. Putting politics aside, in simplistic terms the casualties on both sides are people–men, women, children, babies, elderly. For those who met death, their last day began as usual…they were enjoying the Sabbath hours which is highly revered and sacred for faithful Jewish believers.

I cannot imagine. I don’t want to see the carnage. I don’t want to hear screams. I don’t want to hear bombs hitting targets. I don’t want to believe a group overshadowed with evil’s darkest motives exists and carries out horrific acts of violence against another human being.

I want to see Light. I want to witness God’s power sweeping through Israel and wiping the terrorists from the map. I want justice granted for every lost life. I want peace to be ushered in and lay like a blanket over the entire area of carnage, bringing comfort to heartbroken and devastated families.

I want to see Light. The Light of Jesus. I want to see Jesus transform hearts, minds, and souls. I want to see Israel restored and rejuvenated.

What I want may not be fathomable. But God. In the midst of all that breaks my heart, He is weeping with Israel even while He is beside me as I pray for her…and against my own understanding…and being reminded from a good friend’s social media post…I also pray for the enemy.

They need His Light, too.

This weekend—as you’re reading this–marks a special day for me and my family. Sunday, October 15 is my dad’s birthday. Had he not passed away in 2012 at the age of 91, my goodness he’d be 102. While you may think that’s a very large number for a person’s lifespan, consider I have two great aunts who reached 100 and beyond. Great Aunt Esther lived to be 100 and Aunt Vinie was a mature 104!

Many people often describe their father as being “their hero’. That’s a description I’ve never given to my dad; I prefer to honor him by quickly pointing out that he was the BEST” role model” for me in many ways. In the Book of Galatians we are given a list of fruits that are produced by the spirit of God. They are Love *Joy *Peace *Patience *Kindness *Goodness *Faithfulness *Gentleness and *Self-Control. Though it may be hard to comprehend, I saw every one of these beautiful attributes in my dad. I dare say if gentle teasing and a “good shaggy dog story” (as he often described a corny joke) could be part of that fruitful  harvest, those would be hanging on the vine too.

My dad–Jack to his family and friends–never met a stranger. He struck up conversations everywhere we went, whether to the local hardware store in our neighborhood, a grocery store, restaurant, lumber yard…you get the picture. He especially enjoyed striking up conversations with children and encouraging young parents in the midst of a child’s tantrum that better days were ahead.  

Growing up in Saginaw, which had a thriving downtown business district back in the 50s and 60s, I was always amazed that when we walked into the Sears Roebuck store–namely the tool department–he was called by name. I guess when a guy purchases his power tools from one location you become recognizable. Even salesmen at local dealerships knew him well which was odd to me because my parents did not purchase their first “new” car until 1966. Up until then, the family automobile was always a “used” model, mostly a good ole Oldsmobile. 

His job as a building inspector took him to many homes and businesses over his career of 40+ years…there was one time when we were visiting my Grandma Jewell that he told her keeping a very straight face, “Mom, I’ve been in every bar in Saginaw.” Not one who was quick to scold or judge, gramma replied with her renowned gentility,  “Oh, my Jack, have you?” I’m pretty sure the shared twinkle in their eyes  revealed both humor and love behind the irony of his claim.

In my column last week, I briefly touched on our experience with dementia and my dad. We started noticing changes in 2009 which was when we made the difficult decision to move him from the house he and mother had built together in 1953-54. It’s the only home I remember. Dad moved around a lot as a boy, his dad relocating several times in Michigan to earn a living for their growing family that eventually produced 11 children. Dad was no stranger to being poor, knowing what it meant to go hungry…making a meal stretch….being grateful for God’s provision and faithfulness to provide….and above all, by the time World War II dominated news headlines,  with him and his brothers all serving in various branches of the military, dad saw that each one returned home safely.

I think with him being the middle child of those 11, he had ample experiences that included looking up to the older siblings and helping care for the younger ones. He loved his six brothers but his affection for his four sisters was something to behold. As far as he was concerned, there was none better, and as a youngster on into my adulthood, the reciprocation of love from them to him, was noticeable every time we got together for family dinners and parties. 

In those latter years of dementia, when the ability to carry a conversation became difficult for dad, when words faded behind cloudy eyes searching to recognize loved ones and make sense of things, the last phrase he often spoke with clarity was “family is everything”. It was his parting signature goodbye each time we visited the assisted living home. It became his “go-to” words to communicate feeling loved, giving love, and acknowledging as being the most important possession in life.

Sunday, I will spend  time reflecting and reminising having my dad for just a little over 60 years of my life. There will be some tears…some laughter…a lot of smiles…all while I humbly review the fruit of the Spirit list and take personal inventory where I may be falling short harvesting the attributes so well modeled for me by a guy who found it easy to love, laugh, and be grateful for all good things from above. 

MORE OCTOBER IS…..

As someone who has always been curious and enjoys a slight adventure, I took a second glance at my online search for days in October designed as “National _____” (fill in the blank). I found four more that I could make a connection with.

*National German-American Day–this was a ‘no-brainer’ for me. On my dad’s side his great grandmother came to America in the mid 1850’s in search of a better life. She was 18 and unmarried. In letters written in German between her and her mother back in Germany, they exchanged the everyday kind of conversation most common to all of us. There were questions about how the planting was coming along….how was your harvest…do they plant potatoes in America? While those back and forths don’t bring a lot of excitement when reading, the one paragraph that will bring me to tears every time I read it is…”I know that I will never see you again in this lifetime dear daughter, but I know we will see each other in eternity”. 

*World Mental Health Day–September is designated as National Recovery Month. Mental health and its complexities used to be a ‘hush hush’ topic in our society. But, as more and more people open up about their struggles, and our healthcare professionals give proper recognition to the increase in mental health struggles, hope is on the horizon. I know that in my family I can now recognize that my mother struggled with depression and so did my oldest brother. Unfortunately, neither one sought proper help for their symptoms. I often tell people I could tell by the tone of my brother’s voice if he was feeling “up” or was “down in the dumps”. My mother’s depression took on bad headaches and a lot of resting on the couch. Also as an unfortunate circumstance, while they were struggling I was at a loss as to what to do…what to say … .and most often I fell into the trap of being resentful. That’s a habit I want to overcome as I meet and minister to individuals who struggle with challenges to good mental health.

National Stop Bullying Day–Looking back on my childhood, I honestly don’t believe I was ever bullied. If teasing counts, well, I was the target of unkind remarks in my elementary years and junior high. I needed glasses by the time I was in 5th grade so I was called “Four Eyes”. Late to develop, sometimes I was pointed out as being “Flat Chested”. I had my fair share of snowballs thrown at me on my walks to junior high.

When I was in the first grade the neighbor boy David said something to me that I didn’t like so I beat him up in front of the other kids. To this day, if we see one another he reminds me of the incident. (He never bugged me again)

National Dessert Day–who in their right mind couldn’t get behind this one!? Goodness, it was sheer joy when we came home from school to find oatmeal cookies … .an apple pie or two…or a lemon pie…on the kitchen counter! How wonderful to know that while we were away at school our mom was cooking up something tremendous! Going to our grandmother’s home meant several pies lined up on the washer & dryer….cookies in the jar….a banana cake if we hit pay dirt (and to this day no one can duplicate her recipe)

I don’t know who thinks up these ‘national days’ but I give them credit for creativity, clever minds, concerned hearts, along with bringing awareness to each.

So, while I still have on my reading glasses (I’m still “Four Eyes”) I think I’ll go look for a yummy treat to enjoy later in the afternoon.

This weekend turns the calendar page to October 1 and as I once again asked myself “what shall I write about this week?” I got the notion to type in my search engine “special days in October”. The list is quite extensive. Many are serious…there’s a fair share that seem ludicrous while the remainder are quite silly….

I scrolled quickly down the list to see how many observances I could see myself participating. I identified five from the number in the long list…and though they may not be in a top ten list….I made fast connections with each.

*International Older Persons...hmmm, I noticed the word “older” versus “old”. Doesn’t seem that long ago as a young working adult I thought the 25 year old married guys in my department were “OLD”….I’ll be 70 in a month…guess my youthful opinion makes me a dinosaur now.

*National Coffee Day….I had my first cup of coffee at the age of 19 and that was by default. All the guys in my department drank coffee; if I wanted tea or hot chocolate it meant rinsing out the sole coffee carafe to have hot water. That meant extra steps to the bathroom…so I heaped a lot of cream and sugar to quench the taste of black coffee. It didn’t take long to realize adding sugar to my coffee was stacking up calories…dropped the sugar….not too much later I was able to eliminate the cream, too. But! I admit that I do enjoy seasonal creamer flavors that come out in the Fall and at Christmas!

*National Name Your Car...I didn’t know this day existed. Gosh, my husband and I have been naming our cars since we got married in 1980. A sampling includes Buzz Bomb, Madonna, Blue Whale, Jack, Hazel, The Waggie, The Buick, Snow White, Red Racer. I have no idea WHY we name our cars, but it’s been fun. I even had to ask my husband to help me remember a few names. He stepped in as I was writing to have me include names of cars from his own family…mom’s was the Rust Rocket and granny’s was the Silver Bullet.

*National Be Nice...for heaven’s sake isn’t it a shame we humans HAVE to be reminded to be nice? I had to include this one because after all, that’s the format of my blog. So, have you been nice today? You have until midnight…and then you can start over tomorrow when you wake.

*World Hospice & Palliative….this one holds a lot of significance. Both of my parents were placed under the care of hospice; I cannot describe the level of gratitude and respect I have for this organization. Caring for people in their final days, weeks, or months is a special calling. I’ve yet to meet a hospice employee who was not gracious, loving, and totally committed to serving families, sacrificing time and energy.

There you have it. There’s a few of special days in October that brought back immediate memories from long ago to the present. If you’ve got a few minutes, do your own search and see what you might want to celebrate in October, too. Grab a cup of coffee….glance at your car and give it a name….be nice today…heck, be nice every day! and be grateful for life, for the air in your lungs…pray you get to become one of the “older” people.